Roxy Sass: Going Green in the Sheets

April 27, 2012, 12:40 a.m.

Roxy’s favorite color is usually nude, but after three-plus years at Stanford, she’s found herself partial to going green. In the spirit of sustainability (and because Roxy’s hooked up with her fair share of earth systems majors), she’s decided to offer some tips on environmentally friendly hookups.

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle

Roxy has tried to internalize the principles of sustainability into all aspects of her life. And while Roxy isn’t one to reduce her excesses, she doesn’t say no to occasionally recycling a boy from her past. Just, you know, so he doesn’t go to waste. And for the reusing? Roxy’s never been known for her restraint; she makes sure to reuse as many times per night/day/between classes as possible.

Save Water

Water is a precious resource, particularly in California. Roxy believes that it’s possible to minimize your footprint while maximizing…other body parts. Try cutting your water use in half by showering with someone else. And wearing less clothing is always a good way to cut down on laundry. Or, for the truly committed, hook up outdoors so there are no sheets to clean. When you’re doing it for the environment, no one can resist.

Save Energy

Turn each other on, not the lights: “I’m sorry, would you mind if I turned off the lights? I’m trying to conserve energy.” Alternatively, Roxy’s found that the best way to save energy is switching off who’s on top. If you’re lucky, Roxy might even give you…LEED certification.

Some other tips

Roxy recently learned that having babies is just about the worst thing that you can do for the environment. So if you feel like you’re on the verge of some major ahem emissions, you’d better capture and sequester them. Eating meat is also pretty bad for the environment, so Roxy suggests you cut down on your meat consumption…outside the bedroom, of course.

Know any climate change skeptics? They may not believe in global warming just yet, but Roxy can heat things up beyond the point of denial. Send them her way at [email protected].

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