Rather than showing a play or film screening, on Tuesday evening Roble Theater showcased “Sex in the Dark.” Aptly named, the event presented an anonymous, all-you-want-to-know question-and-answer session about sex in a pitch black room.
As students entered the dark, they were handed glow-in-the-dark bracelets and necklaces and offered cupcakes with glowing frosting. An index card and a fluorescent condom was placed on each participant’s seat.
Roble Hall Resident Fellow (RF) Becky Bull prefaced the event and its intentions.
“Whether you are choosing to have sex or not, you should know what you’re doing, and you should enjoy it, and it should be consensual,” Bull said.
Professional sex educators Colin Adamo and Dorian Solot began Sex in the Dark on a light-hearted note with a joke about sexuality, where Solot asked that audience members not silence their phones but rather “leave them on vibrate.” Solot is the co-founder of Sex Discussed Here!, an organization that provides pairs of sex educators to present engaging sex education programs at colleges, high schools and business around the country. Adamo is the creator of “Hooked Up & Staying Hooked,” an online sexual health and relationship resource for teen boys.
To start, Adamo and Solot encouraged audience members to write their personal questions about sex and sexuality on the index cards, which were then handed in to the coordinators via a neon-painted question box.
Before commencing the Q&A, the Adamo and Solot reminded the audience that a diversity of backgrounds affects the way we each think about sex and that the event was a safe space for all types of questions.
Questions covered a wide variety of sex-related topics. One question that many students might find practical asked, “How do you deal with others having loud sex in a dorm?” to which Adamo and Solot suggested an equally loud playlist. Others included, “How can women achieve better orgasms with a male partner?”; “How do you make a girl squirt?”; “Is masturbation bad for you?”; and “Does penis size matter?” On the latter, Adamo and Solot concluded, “It’s not the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean that matters.”
The duo also fielded much weightier questions informatively. One question asked, “How do you avoid thinking about past sexual assault when aroused?” Solot explained that no simple solution exists and that some may seek help from counseling, a sex therapist or journaling. She additionally recommended books to survivors that guided them through the healing process.
Adamo and Solot hope that the event in its entirety informed the audience on all aspects of sexuality.
“We want to make sure you leave here with information that helps you make decisions that are healthy, responsible and right for you,” Adamo said.
Contact Caroline Kimmel at ckimmel ‘at’ stanford.edu.