In his latest debate against Raphael Warnock, Georgia Senate candidate Herschel Walker brought more to the table than just an honorary sheriff deputy’s badge. He brought more stories, as well as a deluge of memorabilia, all stuffed in a Dollar Tree plastic bag.
When Warnock began his points regarding the role of the military in the country, Walker pulled out his Civil War Campaign medal, claiming he had earned it during his tour of duty fighting Union soldiers in Antietam.
Later, when discussing climate change, Walker pulled out a Nobel Peace Prize, as well as Nobel Prizes in chemistry, physics and medicine, saying, “I am working with many scientists.”
In the Team Herschel store, the online store for Herschel Walker’s bid for Senate, Walker has now come out with new merchandise including replica Oscars, Grammys and Emmys, all of which he claims to be selling because he has too many.
When asked about the clearly fake props during a post-debate interview, Walker brandished a certificate, retorting, “It says right here that you yourself testified to the legitimacy of my accomplishments.”
Editor’s Note: This article is purely satirical and fictitious. All attributions in this article are not genuine, and this story should be read in the context of pure entertainment only.