Roxy Sass’ Christmas List

Dec. 4, 2013, 1:54 p.m.

It may be Dead Week, but Roxy hasn’t been doing much studying. She’s been working on something much more important: her Christmas list. She might be a bit too mature to sit on Santa’s lap, but Roxy’s still got a few things she’d like to ask for this holiday season.

– Mistletoe. Lots of it. Everywhere. Roxy doesn’t usually need an excuse to smooch, but it sure is nice when the world gives her one. This holiday foliage is the best wingman out there – Roxy advises you to take advantage and engineer an opportunity to kiss that cute boy or girl you’ve been eyeing. Or, if you don’t mind being put on Santa’s naughty list, hang some above your building’s door and watch the dormcest begin.

A massage. The stress of fall quarter has taken its toll on Roxy’s body (she’s sore from all those late nights spent “studying”), and there’s nothing better for aching muscles than a nice back rub. But let’s be real, Roxy likes her Xmas presents to be more like “XXX”mas, so this massage better be more naughty than nice. Whipped cream is festive, right?

New toys. And Roxy’s not talking about the ones you can buy at Toys “R” Us… She’s got her eye on something a little more spicy, and, surprisingly, Palo Alto can deliver. Check out the newest store on University: Good Vibrations, the most (only?) sex-positive shop in walking distance of campus. It’s about time that the country’s tech capital has a place to explore technology of a more sensual variety.

Want to help Roxy stuff her stocking? Contact her at [email protected].

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