While the Super Bowl commercials this year were filled with gems, perhaps the most shocking was Office Depot’s categorical denunciation of the concept of evil in their latest commercial.

The 30-second, 5.5-million-dollar advert is the Super Bowl’s most risqué yet, featuring a woman slowly undressing as a gravely male voiceover narrates that “here at Office Depot, we believe that evil is bad because it isn’t good. Buying printer ink at Office Depot is fighting for that good, and that’s why we’re announcing the donation of $254 dollars to Citizens Against Evil.” Just before the woman finishes undressing, the ad suddenly cuts to a hypnotic, flashing pattern and a strange low hum that lasts for 4.6 seconds, the purpose of which is still unknown.

“We really wanted to show consumers what Office Depot believes in,” explained Office Depot’s Senior Director of Marketing Brad Seigfreid. “The question these days really isn’t ‘what can I buy at office depot;’ the question these days is ‘what does a purchase at office depot stand for?’” For Office Depot, Sigfreid went on to explain, the answer was simple: Office Depot is for good, and against evil.

The move has shocked many and has produced a wave of controversy on the internet in the wake of the ad’s release. Just a few hours after the Super Bowl, the hashtags #EvilRights and #VillainsArePeopleToo were trending on Twitter in the United States.

Editor’s Note: This article is purely satirical and fictitious. All attributions in this article are not genuine, and this story should be read in the context of pure entertainment only.