Remote Nomad: Summer TV Summary

July 15, 2010, 12:17 a.m.

Remember the days of summer reading? I can’t. My ability to plow through hundreds of pages of Dickens has been displaced, temporarily I hope, by the spell of Netflix instant streaming. Though Hulu has finally implemented its “members only” club for $10 a month, I have succeeded in filling my summer with enough television to qualify me as a statistic in an obesity study. So, thank you for taking some time away from moving pictures for my own written words, even if my words steer you straight back to the television.

Remote Nomad: Summer TV SummaryThe summer television season is still young and ripe – “Mad Men” returns July 25, “Weeds” August 16 and “Dexter” has technically become a fall show with its September 26 premiere date. The current offerings have been largely underwhelming. All I can say is, I never thought I’d appreciate sports this much. Here’s a breakdown of the shows I’ve been watching, for better or worse:

“True Blood” (HBO, Sundays at 9)

Previously, “True Blood” had showcased all the best parts about paid cable: artistic nudity and gore, high quality production, stellar acting and a quality akin to crack. Unfortunately, the third season has confirmed that too much of anything is a bad thing, even in the world of paid cable budgets. There are too many plot lines, too many important characters and too many scenes per episode. I find myself wondering when it will end (the lack of commercials makes it difficult to pace). The only characters who can still sustain my interest are Lafayette, Eric and Jessica; if you watched season two, that combination might sound reasonable, but this season their screen time has dwindled in favor of werewolves and vampire monarchy. It’s unclear whether I’ll be able to stay loyal for the entire season.

“Top Chef: DC” (Bravo, Wednesdays at 9)

It’s still early in the game over at Bravo’s reality competition jewel, “Top Chef.” The creative team behind the challenges has indulged in every DC stereotype possible, but I suppose I shouldn’t fault them for that since DC is hardly a restaurant town a la New York or Los Angeles. The contestants are still in the pack mentality and have failed to distinguish themselves, though the show is playing up the ethnic diversity this season. The ethics of casting Angelo, who runs a Michelin-star restaurant, are dubious at best, so I look forward to the episodes with fewer contestants and more interpersonal drama. The proudly-touted addition of Eric Ripert to the judges’ table has yet to register its full impact on the show, as Ripert has only judged two challenges thus far.

“The Hard Times of RJ Berger” (MTV, Mondays at 10)

MTV ventures into the world of scripted television and finds success in 30-minute comedy. This brainchild of David Katzenberg (Nicky Hilton’s boyfriend) reinvents the often clichéd genre of high school television with not only the protagonist’s large penis but also refreshing interpretations of familiar setups, such as the school musical and a cougar employer.

“Hung” (HBO, Sundays at 10:30)

In this show’s premiere season, I found myself waiting to be rewarded for my investment in the half-hour comedy about a Detroit gym teacher turned male prostitute. Two episodes into the second season, I’m still waiting. The soapy seductive potential of prostitution is drowned out by the writers’ preoccupation with family life and the economic fall of Detroit. This concept was certainly timely last year, but, as the market rebounds, the ambivalence of Ray, the prostitute in question, toward his clients, his morality and his money has begun to bore me.

“Pretty Little Liars” (ABC Family, Tuesdays at 8)

THIS is the breakout hit of the summer. ABC Family is like “Sesame Street”: it knows its target market (young teens for the former, toddlers for the latter) but always winks at its older audience (see also “The Secret Life of the American Teenager”). Based off of trashy young adult novels by Sara Shepard, the series investigates the murder of the high school queen bee, whose four best friends are left to hide what they know. This plot is nowhere near as interesting as the idiosyncrasies of these four girls: Aria is “dating” her English teacher; Hanna has eating, shoplifting and parent issues, plus her boyfriend is the preacher’s son; Spencer comes from a family of overachievers, with a cruelly perfect older sister whose fiancé Spencer kissed; and Emily is dabbling in lesbianism. This level of brilliance surely can’t be sustained forever, so I’m taking it in while I still can.

That’s all for now! Unclear when you’ll hear from me next, unless you’re my neighbor and you hear me chastising my friends to shut the heck up during the “Mad Men” premiere or the “Pretty Little Liars” theme song.

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