HUMOR: “One small step for man, one large leap for a man with much shorter legs.” — Neil Armstrong
SATIRE: Will Apple add a button, or remove a button? Will they add this port, or remove that port? They might even add a letter to its name!
SATIRE: “I’m always scared that the bubble holding us will pop and we’ll all fall to our doom, metaphorically speaking of course,” said Lakers bench player/cheerleader JR Smith.
Local racist, Edgar Pritchard, only recently learned that the name of his favorite football team, the Cleveland Browns, isn’t rooted in racism.
SATIRE: Some are dissatisfied with Biden’s VP pick because, as an inanimate object, the Obama cutout is unable to fulfill any of the duties of the vice president.
Former national security advisor John Bolton recently published his tell-all book The Room Where It Happened, recounting his experiences with the Trump administration. A majority of the book focuses on Trump’s frequent remarks about Bolton’s prominent mustache.
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SATIRE: Several smaller artists will also be performing, including a laptop on YouTube autoplay and a shopping cart full of rubber chickens.
SATIRE: Every fall, Frosh flock to Arrillaga Alumni Center for Frosh Formal, excited to dance, take pictures and listen to their frosh council reps complain about being sober monitors.
SATIRE: You may have heard of Hot Girl Summer, but how about Frosh Flu Fall? Just ask some Stanford freshmen.
SATIRE: We at The Stanford Daily are proud to present an anonymous interview with the sole person in the Class of 2023 without imposter syndrome.